Wilkommen!



Friday, January 20, 2012

In Recovery

[Later edit: In light of what transpired a month later, this posting feels more than a little dumb and embarrassing, but deleting it would be dishonest, so it remains. Next time I feel this way, I'll just take a little break, not try to quit my entire blog.]

Readers,

As you may have noticed, I haven't posted in a week, and I wasn't exactly going gangbusters before that. I haven't come through on several topics, including finishing Wizardry V, posting on dnd, or offering a GIMLET for Skyrim, and I've only won two games since August.

I finally have to face reality: my workload, plus the non-work goals that I want to accomplish, are not compatible with spending hundreds of hours a month playing computer games. Since I became self-employed last year, all this game-playing is directly affecting my financial security.

When I started the blog, it was because I felt an unnatural compulsion to play these games (I hit upon my plan to play every game in chronological order before I knew I was going to blog about it), and I wanted something positive and permanent to come out of it. Except for one or two weeks of Skyrim, I haven't felt this compulsion for several months. Although I value your comments and our dialogue, I'm just not having any fun with it. I know that's showing in both my postings and long absences.

I'm not definitively canceling the blog. It's possible that at some point this year, my professional life will achieve a greater degree of stability and I'll find myself with a lot of down time again. Or I may wake up in the middle of the night three weeks from now, and feel a mad desire to explore wireframe hallways, and you'll seen an erratic posting here or there. In the meantime, I'll leave the blog active for new readers who want to read my postings on older games.

I'm sorry it's come to this, but I thank you for your participation in my little quest. You're the best NPCs.

Sincerely,

Chester "Chet" Bolingbroke
"The Recovering CRPG Addict"

149 comments:

  1. Sad for us, but completely understandable.

    Thanks for all the work you did on the blog -- it was consistently one of my favorite reads on the net. I'd love to see it reworked as a book someday..

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  2. You'll be missed. Hope things settle down enough to resume the project, but if not, it's because you're doing things of greater worth.

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  3. I hate to say it but with such a monumental task in front of you I assumed this day would come at some point, no slight intended to you at all. I think it'd take either someone independently wealthy or a retiree to have a chance at finishing this list with the same quality you've gotten us all used to! Thanks for the great work you've done and best of luck with your business and life.

    PS: What about possibly farming out the work and making this a collaborative effort?

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  4. I agree with Drek, maybe you could find someone who shares your values and love of the RPGs and let them go through the list for a little while.

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  5. yes
    this is my favorite blog

    -rodrigo

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  6. Quite enjoyed reading this, but obviously life must come first. Good luck!

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  7. Sorry to hear about it, Chet. Was looking forward to seeing you try some more of the classics. Part of the problem may be that the current games at the top of your queue aren't exactly stirring your interest (Wizardry 5, Bard's Tale 3). Maybe when work settles down, you can try a different order, based on votes of readers, and see if that gives you the motivation to continue.

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  8. Thanks for all the great writing! It was a fun ride while it lasted. You will be missed.

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  9. Well, you had a nice run. Got me interested in replaying some old gems. Maybe not going through all the games but I'll definitely try series like Ultima, M&M or Ishar from part one.

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  10. Thanks for all the effort and time you've put into this blog. I've really enjoyed reading it. For many of the older games your blog is probably the best resource on the internet for anyone interested in reading about them. All the best.

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  11. I'm happy to read this post! Thank you for all the ones before it too.

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  12. I hope you post periodically about just this and that- I know I will miss you otherwise. I support your decision although I will miss your blog a LOT. I know I will also miss a sense of "community" amongst all us readers, especially those of us who posted more than once or twice. I shall miss those voices as well.

    I hope your life goes well.

    *sniff* I miss you already!

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  13. I want to THANK YOU for setting up this blog and also creating a community around it that loves looking at these older games. We all still have a chance to discuss the games you have covered in the comment sections of your posts.

    I think it's completely fine and understandable to abandon the goal of playing through all the games on the list. You need to set your priorities. In retrospect, the list of hundreds of games never was realistic to begin with. If ever your interest in CRPGs should revive again, just limit yourself to titles that really interest you I guess.

    In the meantime, all the best with everything!

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  14. Sorry to hear it's over. The goal was certainly ambitious, and it's completely understandable that you've got to put food on the table rather than scratch our nostalgia itch for free. If your addiction returns, don't hesitate to make a triumphant return. You will forever have a slot in my RSS reader; I will keep a constant vigil... Even if this is truly the end, what you have created is of immense value to me personally and it is greatly appreciated. Thanks!

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  15. Chet -
    We will definitely miss you, and as everyone else has said, thanks for all your writing over the last 2 years. Focus on the important things. Maintaining a blog isn't as simple as it looks (and I should know) and you definitely did a great job.

    Like others have said, I'll keep you bookmarked for reference, and will check back every couple of months or so. If you ever feel up to it, we will be here. It doesn't have to be games, just whatever you want to write on.

    I hope that if any of your fans decide to carry on what you started, they will acknowledge you as inspiration (like The Trickster did).

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  16. This is sad news, but not totally surprising. There were signs that you no longer enjoyed the project.
    Hopefully (for us) you will feel the craving for playing and bloging about CRPGs again some day and resume the blog. But there is no point in doing it as long as you don't enjoy it and it starts to become a chore.

    Your blog has certainly been a great inspiration to me and I've reached early 1990 in my own little play games in chronological order project, and I'm currently playing Champions of Krynn.

    Thanks for the best blog I've read.

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  17. Bravo good sir, bravo.

    I'm glad to hear you've kicked your habit and that we, the lucky readers, were able to enjoy the time that you did spend with us.

    For now enjoy your work, enjoy time with your wife and enjoy not not having to worry about CRPGs. Tonight, when hopefully you are out with your wife enjoying some good jazz in a nice comfy bar, please raise your gimlet for we'll be raising ours in your honor.

    If one day you decide to return, will be waiting, ready to help you over another relapse. In the words of Kikoskia "Until next time folks. Until next time."

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  18. Wizardry V claims another victim.

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  19. Fair enough, I've hugely enjoyed your blog. Many thanks and good luck in your future endeavours.

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  20. Wizardry... or pedit5, the first ever CRPG?

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  21. Chet, I love this blog, so I'm sad to see it go on hiatus, even though I do understand. If I may be so bold, I have some suggestions on how to prevent burnout if you do return at some point.

    Don't feel beholden to your readers. This is your blog - you should post on your own schedule. We will always prefer fewer posts over no posts.

    Make your rules more flexible. Really, it's ok if you backup some saved games. We don't want you to kill yourself trying to live up to some unreasonable principle of authentic experience. Reload! And if after 1-3 hours it's clear that a game is terrible, feel free to move on.

    You don't need to win a game just because you can. If you've progressed deep into a game, but it stopped being fun, move on.

    In my opinion you've held yourself to an impossible standard, so it's not surprising that you burned out (if it's fair to call it that). We would rather you take it easier, post less often if you need to, and take the occasional shortcut if you keep bringing us the awesome CRPG classics (and not-so-classics) from history.

    Thanks again for all your effort. Even if you really are done, we really do appreciate you.

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  22. It's sad that I just found this blog last week. We'll be here if you ever choose to come back to this project. Not knowing of this blog I had planned to play through all console RPGs and ended up getting through some, but lost interest and was slightly perturbed by the quality of the my videos.

    Finding this blog has inspired me to use a blog to play through all console RPGs in date order in addition to the videos, whose quality I hope improves once I'm able to afford a new computer. Come follow along and find out what you've been missing from consoles Chet, I'd be honored to have you as a reader. I only hope my writing style will improve to the quality of yours.

    Thank you for the two years you've kept this up. Good luck with your self employment, and here's to looting the corpses. Cheers.

    -ZR

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  23. Thanks for everything Chet. Your adventures and analyses were entertaining and interesting, and I hope you find the stability you seek.

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  24. When I read this, my knees got weak. This is truly a sad for me. I had become addicted to this blog. I don't know what to say....

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  25. The Crpg Addict should have concentrated on the best of those old games like the Ultimas and the Gold Box and he should have short shifted the tedious or not very good one's like Wizardry(at least up to 6). Forcing himself to play so long on those not so great games was a mistake and I think this is really more burn out(why I rarely finish crpgs) than any other reason. I predict he will come back in a few months with a more 'I will play this until it stops entertaining me and no further' approach. He spent too much time on games really not worth the effort and kind of ruined the fun for himself. The games get better and more user friendly as 90's wore on anyway.

    Remember a similar blog done on old adventure games:

    http://advgamer.blogspot.com/2011/11/adventure-gamer-whats-this-blog-all.html

    Patrick

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  26. I wish you the best success in all of your endeavours, both professional, personal, and of course, the eventual continuation of this blog and its epic project! Cheers!

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  27. You might simply change the goal of this blog and play the CRPGs that you want, for as long as you want. That would probably be more fun overall. You did an admirable job up to this point, but it's okay if you change the mission.

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  28. Thanks for the memories. I hope you're successful in your professional projects and find your hobbies fulfilling whether or not that leads you back here.

    Take care.

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  29. We'll miss you. Take care, and come back when you're ready.

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  30. As another long-time lurker, I'd just say.. thanks for all the hard work writing! I'll still be here when you're available ;)

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  31. I found this blog relatively recently, and I still haven't read it all. Thanks for the excellent posts. I'll periodically check in for new entries.

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  32. I wish you well with your pursuits. As a long time lurker I'll keep it in the subscription list 'just in case'. I've always enjoyed living (or reliving) the games vicariously through your reviews :)

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  33. I too would like to chime in with praise, you have been a very witty and entertaining writer and I have greatly enjoyed playing these games vicariously through your blog.

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  34. Oh no. As a CRPG Addict addict, I don't know what I should do now. :O I know I don't post here very often, but I've been reading this blog for almost a year now, and I often share your little anecdotes with any friends or family members who might be able to at least somewhat understand. That said, I completely understand your decision. I may be able to relate as well.

    I was feeling burned out of doing my retro video playthroughs myself. In hindsight, I think it was more the frustration of two people sharing one computer, and the kids home from the holidays for two weeks, that got to me.

    If you don't have the time, then you simply don't have the time. We are all slaves to time, and must wisely prioritize what we do with this time. The comments above mine are very supportive, and I hope the ones beneath will be that way as well. Some of the anonymous comments from a few posts back were getting downright rude. I don't suppose that helped you either.

    As others have said, I will keep my light of vigil shining. I not only have you in my Google Reader, but have your blog listed in my own blog's sidebar as well. As long as your blog exists, there will be your last post listed there... even if it says, "10 years ago" beneath it. ;) I've been linking to your blog, most notably in my post about Dungeon Master. There are links to all ten of your DM posts. I love those entries.

    You shall be missed. I wish the best to your and your loved ones. I'll keep that light spell burning, in case you need some guidance in getting down to level 5649 of WizarDungeonUltimaTale. Thank you so much for this blog. *hugs*

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  35. Well, I have your feed in my reader and so I'll notice whenever there's a new post.
    Good luck with your endeavours.

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  36. Damn, too early for it to be April....

    As someone who is working at a startup and has been self-employed in the past, I understand your point of view. But I do so love this blog and recommend it to everyone who likes RPGs.

    Usually you wish someone "get well soon", but perhaps this time it's more appropraite to wish "fall off the wagon soon!" ;)

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  37. I completely understand where you're coming from. I love CRPGs with a passion... but in my 40s with a wonderful wife and two children, it's impossible to play as much as I did when I was younger. I've got almost every game on your list in its original box (except for some of the very early ones), and I love to go back and play them. But more and more I find that I just don't have the time to commit to it. I still play... but I have to manage my gaming time very strictly. So I completely undersand where you're coming from.

    I really enjoy your posts and hope to see more in the future... but do what you gotta do for your family, yourself and your sanity.

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  38. Too bad, but somehow expected (it is just too mammoth a task)and RL must always come first of course. Also, passtime activities should be fun and relaxing, not stressful obligations. Perhaps you can separate the blogging about CRPGs and investing impossible amounts of time in playing them a little. Im sure you discovered that your writing talents at least match your playing and disecting CRPG skills. The blog would probably lose some of its monomanic singular focus but that would not necessarily be a bad thing. Anyway, all the best!

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  39. You started this project as a way of dealing with the problems that your desire to play CRPGs was causing your life. From that point of view, this announcement is a spectacular success, even if this was not the envisaged end-result.

    Along the way, you've entertained a good many people, myself included; I'd count that a success, too. So thank you for the entertainment, and whether your path causes you to return here or not, good luck with your endeavours!

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  40. I will keep your blog subscribed in my google reader, so feel free to come back anytime.

    If you decide to come back, also consider relaxing your rules. Drop tedious games quicker if you like, use saved games to save time from boring grinding etc. Whatever to make it more fun and waste less time.

    Anyway, thanks for your entertaining posts so far, whether you continue or not. :)

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  41. Consider this a break of potentially infinite duration. See what you have enthusiasm for. Rather than saddling yourself with a rigidly defined set of rules, write posts when you have good material. I highly doubt you're going to quit playing CRPGs forever, because you're an addict like me. Thus, just write when you want to. This blog has taught you lessons about who you are, I watched it happen. The next lesson you need to learn is about appreciating your wife, and I say that as a man who wishes he had learned that lesson sooner.

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  42. Thanks to CRPGAddict for all his excellent texts, insight and humour. I fully understand and respect the decision to do other things with the precious little time one has available. I myself have had what comes close to being a problem with CRPGs, but funnily enough I've stopped gaming almost altogether during the last few months. It coincides with the Addicts posting more and more seldom and also writing about his problems to find time, motivation and clashes with professional and personal life. I don't know if it's a coincidence that I've stopped gaming and started getting more things done, meeting people and generally feeling a lot better druting this period - but I can say that the Addicts thoughts have indeed made me think. Many thanks once again, and come what may: this has been the first blog I've truly followed and read front to back. Lycka till from Sweden!

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  43. This was a great blog! Thank you!

    by the way Wizardry-Crpgaddict 4-1 :)

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  44. This blog was first in my bookmarks. I check it religiously first every day.

    I cannot bring myself to accept this news. I will continue to check this blog, every day, even if nothing is added. It has simply become a habit. A habit that brought me wonderful memories.

    Dang, I would pay for the privilege of reading this blog.

    My take? I fear the Addict got a taste of Skyrim and decided "what in the Sam Hill am I doing playing ancient games?"

    But no developer today makes games like they did back then.

    Rest peacefully. I will miss you

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  45. Life always come first, dear CRPGAddict. Forcing yourself to post when you're not enjoying is not good at all, but I really hope someday this burn out will fade and we will be able to read your awesome posts again. Good humour, deep insight, well written texts... this adventure of yours have been like a high quality exercise in retro video games journalism, one that many people have enjoyed and found inspiration in.

    Thanks for all the work you've done here. This was a one of a kind blog, and the first one I've been looking for updates every time I opened my reader for more than a year.

    I wish you and your wife the best of lucks, both in real life and in your virtual journeys.

    PS: I don't know how Blogger works when a blog is frozen or abandoned, but please I beg you: don't delete it.

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  46. I'm hoping you don't delete the blog either (but I doubt you were planning to). I remember one Blogger guy who kept a fascinating blog about his use and love of Slackware Linux. He was no geek, which was part of why I thought it was awesome. One day he just pulled up stakes and removed the blog completely. Very sad.

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  47. First of all. Thank you very much for your blog and the inspiration it has given me in starting my own blog about revisiting old classics. I fully understand your decision. The task you were undertaking was too ambitious and without any look into walkthroughs.

    My suggestion is too open up your strict rules a bit like allowing yourself to make backup saves, cancelling games halfthrough if they don´t amuse you anymore etc and move on into the list. OR you only start on games on your list you find interesting.

    In any event, I will be waiting for posts in the future when you have the time and energy.

    /Saintus from http://crpgrevisited.blogspot.com

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  48. Sorry to hear you're hanging up the gloves. You covered the 8 bit era of crpg's more comprehensively than any for profit critic ever could. The history of video gaming is important to keep alive, and your work will remain a testament to the 8 bit era so many of us loved.

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  49. You're very good at writing, almost like you've taken classes or something. I have a blog myself about strategy games but I've been in a slump lately. "I'm not lazy, I just suffer from motivational deprivation!" I don't know what my problem is, but I'm a huge Zelda fan and I've yet to play Twilight Princess, not to mention SS or handhelds, I guess those Zelda titles will wait for me. Although I've enjoyed your blog, more power to you for prioritizing what's important for you.

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  50. Just wanted to add that I've loved the blog, too. I had some ideas for you revisiting the concept in modified form if you feel the desire to, but many other folks in the thread covered them!! So the bottom line is we'd love to have your voice still in whatever form fits your life. I will say you deserve congratulations for pushing it this far -- I know I would not have lasted half as long.

    thanks always!

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  51. Well, it was good blog while it lasted.

    You did a great job. I never thought that I'd be a regular reader of a blog about really old RPGs that I would never, ever play myself. You somehow managed to make it interesting.

    As they say on many multiplayer internet games of the role-playing variety, /clap.

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  52. Hi Chet,

    Thank you, really, for the marvelous work you've done here. I'm not the blog type so much (despite owning one) and yours was the only one I followed. You showed me how to better enjoy CRPGs, revived a great nostalgia I had in me, and just entertained me with your witty and insightful writing.

    Getting a new post was always a highlight of my day (or night) and I was spreading the news: my wife would often ask me "what is your RPG friend talking about these days?", and I would re-tell her your stories, or sometimes have her read exceptionnaly funny paragraphs.

    I'm obviously sad to see you go, but at the same time proud of you being able to control and overcome what was obviously a too strong addiction (compulsion?) at times. With myself a wife, a little almost 2y old boy and a wonderful job, I understand how life must come first (fortunately!).

    Take things your own way at your own pace. I'll be checking in every month or so, and will be there ready to comment if you ever get lost in a wireframe dungeon again.

    Enjoy life!

    -Georges

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  53. Chet,

    I remember when I first saw your blog when it was only like three posts in. I had become addicted to reading about videogames on the net when I first started posting on gamedev.net in Spring 2009. I just happened to find your blog in a Google search on my mom's Blackberry, and I have been frantically reading your posts and all the comments on current posts since.

    In the ~2 years you have been blogging you have shown me some very cool stuff and made me laugh so hard I couldn't breath (Ultima II stupid, LOL!). I will start the blog all over again to recapture how much I love your posts and all that the commenters add to the experience.

    Please, take care of yourself and your family. Congratulations on the new business! And drop me an email when you want me to send back the DnD collection, but untill then I'll keep trying to get a foothold on at least one of the games.

    You've been the best! God bless you,

    Adam "Giuaz" Birkholtz
    "A #1 The CRPG Addict fan"

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  54. Chet, thank you so much for delving so deeply into these old CRPGs and writing such entertaining and thorough posts on them during your retro quest.

    I love the details of the playthroughs, your comments and analysis, and seeing the different branches of CRPG evolution through the various games. I'll very much miss this blog, but I do totally understand about real life intervening - my own Apple II blog has stalled both because of real life and other projects.

    I hope some day you'll be able to return to the old CRPGs, but even if you never do, what you accomplished on this blog is impressive and inspiring.

    Success to you on all your quests, in real-life or realms digital,
    Josh Lawrence

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  55. Just like to echo others' posts (especially Stuart Rue's) - play when you can, post when you can, skip when things get dull, and don't feel compelled to a schedule. Have thoroughly enjoyed reading your blog over the past year - it's the first one I check each day. Hope to see you back here soon - if not, thanks for the entertainment!

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  56. It's a mark of how well-done this blog was that it was able to inspire several other people, myself included, to start their own, similar blogs.

    Sadly, we never got to The Magic Candle or Betrayal at Krondor, but I'm still going to be checking every few days just to make sure the Addict isn't sneaking a game in on the side.

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  57. Please put up a donate link, and we'll sort this silliness out.

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  58. I'd just like to add my thanks for all the entertainment this blog has given me - it's been a fun ride.

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  59. This is devastating news and I really do feel very sad that there won't be more crpgaddict posts, at least for the time being. I've said it before and I'll say it again, you're an inspiration to me and I can only aspire to be half as entertaining, insightful and committed to the cause as you've been when it comes to The Adventure Gamer. I hope I can in some ways carry the baton in your absence, despite covering a different genre. All the best Chet and hopefully we hear from you again in the future.

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  60. I completed Bard's Tale 2 after a 24 year wait. I have you to thank for it Chet. Good luck with your business and I hope you still manage to get some time to game. All the best.

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  61. Maybe try to drop the chronological order. Play any RPG you like, and blog about it.

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  62. I agree with Thom. Put a donate link up so I don't have to go through withdrawal.

    PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do not delete this blog. Ever.

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  63. I expected to see this! It was really exciting you reading about old games CRPG Addict!! You are a really good writer. But old games are dangerous, playing shitty games for a long time cause burn out really soon. You should have known this.

    Well. I hope someday you will return, there are so many good games waiting for you!!! Just think about Ultima VI, VII and Might and Magic 3!!!

    But there are things more important than computer games! And I wish you the best! Have many happy years with your wife!!!

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  64. Addict--this blog was and is terrific. 64 comments (at the time of my posting) attest to that. You will be missed. As a fellow jazz fan, I can say in earnest that you wrote with a grace and flair that would have made the Duke proud. For now, I'm in a sentimental mood .... All best for the future!

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  65. Really sad to see this happen, but completely understand. Hope in the (not too distant) future that you come to a point where you're able to pick this up again (if that is what you want).

    Between this and the (now defunct) Home Of The Underdogs, you guys have given me a view into a side of gaming that I didn't even know existed when I was younger. Thanks for all of your painstaking efforts.

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  66. Clearly someone needs to take over the task.

    Maybe Chet could post an ad and some of the rest of us could donate.

    There has to be someone who is at the right life stage to do this. Retired or something.

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  67. Your comments have all been very kind, and humbling, and while they make me regret my decision a little, I really have to continue this course for now.

    CRPGs have been a regular part of my life since I started playing them at the age of 11. It seems unrealistic that I'm done with them for good. Something always draws me back in. I promise that if I start playing again, I'll start blogging again.

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  68. Good!

    The undercurrent of tragedy has never vanished from these posts. It's right there in the title. This blog wasn't just there to enhance and expand a hobby, but to mitigate one. That sort of thing may be crucial to high art, but in real life, I'm glad to see the back of it. Best of luck with everything.

    Incidentally, I still haven't tried to start the "Spellcrafting" page at TV Tropes.

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  69. Thank you for the good times we have shared via your blog so far. I look forward to a time when you write again or start another blog that we can enjoy.

    I wonder if the pressure of the blog helped to make your compulsion feel like a chore, and in doing so helped you kick said compulsion for the time being?

    If I didn't know myself better I would like to start a blog about that point in a game where it ceases being fun and starts to feel like work. This is what gets me every time and causes me to abandon a game.

    Anyway good luck with your endeavors. If your in the Chicago area anytime I would still like to buy you a gimlet or two in thanks for you providing entertainment.

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  70. Well the feedreader will let me know when you have a relapse so take as much "recovery" time as you need ;)

    Of course, at times like this, I find there's really only one thing to say:

    "You can't go. All the plants will die!"

    I look forward to your triumphant return.

    Skarlarth

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  71. @CRPGAddict: Don't regret the decision. I'm sure we'll hear from you again, when CRPGs are able to balance healthily with the rest of your life. It's not a bad thing to hit the reset button and get things back in order, however long that takes. And if you never get back to the blog, as sad as that would be, it would be even sadder for you to continue past the point that the hobby had become destructive.

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  72. Perhaps your life and financial security would be better if you didn't abandon things before you finished them. Have you tried any medication for your "unnatural compulsions"?

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  73. Sad but not unexpected. And really, if we're all honest with ourselves, the blog went downhill rapidly after you dissed Faery Tale Adventure.

    (I kid!!!)

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  74. "unnatural compulsions" like getting off on being a dick online?

    I still think that having trolls are a sign that you have "made it" in the online community. Its like Rock stars having groupies, minus the sex, but I bet they carry just as much disease.

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  75. I agree UbAh. I'm looking forward to the time I can say, "wow, I have my first spammer! I've made it to the search engines" and "My first troll! I must be moving up."

    At the moment though, I'm just happy to have comments at all.

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  76. I am truly saddened. The Addict was a hell of a writer, and a damn good wordsmith.

    Put this blog all together in a print edition, and you have a best seller.

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  77. Great blog! But if you're not having fun, you're not having fun. And real-life MUST come first.

    If things change in the future, great. Otherwise, good luck with your life!

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  78. All the best! Thanks for your kind words on my Flash version of Ultima 4. Looking forward to when you (eventually) yet again take up the quests.

    Blair Leggett

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  79. Really sad to see this, since I've been following your blog ever since Chrontendo linked it. Although I'm much more of a fan of Japanese console RPGs, it's still interesting to see reviews of all these early PC RPGs that never get talked about very much, and maybe discovering new gems via your blog. Well, if life gets in the way, you can't help it... though I do hope one day you decide to come back and continue with it. Best wishes for the future...

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  80. I've put off reading the whole thread and commenting for a few days, as I didn't want to have to face the fact that there is a good chance this was over. I started reading this blog....last Christmas? Early summer? I don't remember, but it kept me company many late days at work last summer. I enjoyed your writing and always was looking forward to when you would hit my 'good enough' point that you wrote about and I could play along.

    I wish that you'd not gotten addicted to Skryim, and I see why you need a break after playing 100 hours in a weekend-- After all xmas break and 3 weeks since my playtime is only 98 hours total! I would advise that seeing a psychologist might not be a bad idea if you can afford it, as it might allow you to enjoy your hobby with less obsession.
    I also do feel guilty that we were all busy arguing over Skyrim's inclusion in the blog to notice you falling off the wagon and offer support.

    On a more cheerful note: I guess this renders my idea of outsourcing your character leveling to your readers moot. Would seem easier to do then getting your wife to do it.

    Anyway, you had a great run, and I am leaving this is my feedreader in the hopes that you do get some financial and emotional stability and can resume play at some point.

    --Canageek.

    P.S. What? You didn't think my possibly final comment would be a short one, did you? Have I ever written you a short comment?

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  81. Oh man, we never even made it out of the 80ties and still you played 68 games! There must simply be way too many games out there. Maybe what you should really do is just play a few really memorable games like Pirates. Or limit yourself to games that had a big budget and nice art and so on. Anyway I understand that you should work and not just spend all your time on this blog, actually I should be working right now but I'm on this blog again like many time before when I should've worked. I guess that makes me a crpg addict addict, and if anyone were to read my blog they would become a crpg addict addict addict.

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  82. As also an RPG addict myself I'm so sad about this news. I saw the news about your blog in rpgwatch and decided to visit. To be honest I first thought you mad. But I have become a silent follower of your posts. I began to play RPGs at the mid 1990s and your posts actually urged me to play old classics like Pool of Radiance, Might&Magic 1-2 and Ultima 4-5. I actually printed them on papers to read before sleep (I don't like reading at computer screen) and it would be a great encyclopaedia for RPGamers out there, and I hope it still will be. But I understand you deeply, I also have a job, and a wife and a kid. We all have a life to pursue, whether we like it or not. I hope you solve your financial and personal issues in a short time and we can see your new posts here. Anyway thanks for your great efforts.

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  83. All I have to say is...

    Thank you.

    Thank you for your great blog and thank you for getting me started on the Malazan Books of the Fallen.

    This is the only blog I have ever followed. I have to disagree with you about there having been a decline in quality. For me, it was great to the end(even the posts about Skyrim).

    Thank you.

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  84. Even though I'm obviously sad to see the blog go on hiatus, I'm also glad that you were able to make a clear cut. Hope you'll eventually find the right work/life-balance that enables you to continue this fascinating project in some form or another (cf. Stuart's suggestions). I will miss your suave writing, the insightful comments it conjured and of course the Excel maps that seeped with nostalgia. Thanks for a great ride, I'll happy stand in line for a second round.

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  85. I've only commented here a couple times, but it's sad to see you go. I checked this site religiously every day, it was definitely my favourite read on the web, but like others have said real life must come first. Cheers.

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  86. Addict,

    I have lurked here for most of the blog, but I have never commented until now. Actually, I have only read the entries in full for either games I have already beaten or don't intend to play. I didn't read the others (yet) because i didn't want to be spoiled. You inspired me to try and beat every RPG that I haven't played, including the C64 and Amiga ones. Since reading your blog I have beaten Wizardry 1, 2, 3, Ultima 0 and 1, Lands of Lore, Sword of Fargoal and others (in addition to various modern titles). In all that time, I have taken comfort in knowing that someone was doing a similar task, and it made it somehow not feel... pointless. And after a day to think about, I'm going to continue that.

    Although I agree that real life comes first, I do think we all make choices about how to spend our leisure time. I don't think there is anything wrong with spending a big chunk of yours on CRPGs. I strongly believe that you should not go in chronological order if you continue, though. It is much more fun to jump around in eras and in genres (action rpg, turn-based, sci-fi, etc.) than play the same types of game in quick succession. You can still do your Gimlet, and you just knock one off the list well in advance.

    Anyway, thanks for the inspiration, and I really wish you the best in whatever you decide to do. By the way, please don't take the blog down, as I still intend to come back and read it as I make more progress on the Ultimas, Phantasies, etc.!

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  87. Most definitely, the blog must stay up regardless of if you return or not down the line. It's a great resource for future gamers.

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  88. I've read every post on this blog and I've enjoyed all of them. Very sorry to hear about the hopefully temporary hiatus. I played most of the games when they were first released, although I didn't have anywhere near the success ratio that Chet did.

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  89. Google adsense is giving us banners for rehab clinics; too funny.

    Anyway, it was a marvelous blog and it is a shame to see it wrap up. Thanks for all your writing.

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  90. Just found this blog and it's inspired me to check out a couple games I never got around to. Thanks for the great read, and best of luck in whatever your future endeavors are.

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  91. Addict,

    I've commented only a scant few times, but I've been reading your blog almost since the beginning. Being one who is almost always insanely busy, I can empathize with your choice and the difficulty of making it. But I can't say I don't hope there's a chance we'll hear from you in the future. Your blog -- your writing -- and your mission have all been wonderful. In my eyes, you've made the internet a better place. It's just nice knowing people like you (and the community that has grown in your comments) are out there. In a very tangible way, you've given so much to us -- months of reading and enjoyment. And I know this might sound cheesy -- but your championing the 'games of yore' -- well, it enlivens them, I think, and makes the world a little less lonely -- a little fuller. So, in short -- I suppose all I can say is thank you. And best wishes to you and Irene in the future. I hope someday we'll hear from you again. :)

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  92. Thanks and best of luck. You're making the right decision.

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  93. I am sorry to see you go Chet. I will concur that this site in addition to be about fun games and contained your excellent writing also had civility and that is rare on these kind of blogs. All the best and if you find time I hope you return.

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  94. I second all the other messages of appreciation. You have done a great work here. Thank you again. Do not worry about us. You take care of yourself and your wife.

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  95. Dear Addict,

    I've bee lurking around this blog for a while now. I've never really enjoyed any other blog before yours. I'm really sad to see you go, but I understand your decision completely.

    I DO hope you'll write again, though. Your blog is/was the best!

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  96. Let me say you Mr.Crpgaddict thay your blog was my source of inspiration for making my own CRPG game. I started last year and now the project is more or less half done. Like any other non trivial thing, it is hard and sometimes you want to desert, so I can feel empathy with you and your project. I hope you come back some day.

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  97. @Anonymous
    Why not post a link? I'm working on my own game right now, or rather SHOULD be working on my own game, I know how it's like, sometimes you wanna desert.
    @Chet
    Why don't you play some easier games? Like Zelda games? Compared to Pool of Radiance, which I tried out and I never got passed those fuckers in the rope guild, they always beat my party to goo, Zelda is a lot easier. Pool of Radiance felt like a burden, and addictive burden but still a burden. Wind Waker though is full of visual candy and the game never gets old (or hard). You should be able to play it within 20 hours without having to rush, even if it's your first time and you don't know where everything is. When it ends it will always feel like it's too soon, Zelda games never over stay themselves.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is funny, because I think Pool of Radiance was one of the games the Addict really enjoyed.

      Actually I think myself that it is a pretty enjoyable game. It is not that hard, though ,myself was unable to beat it yet, and later games in the series become more refined. And Pool of Radiance has good graphics, you can use many different tactics, and there is a lot of things to discover.

      Wizardry V, on the other hand, and many other games of that era(maybe you can consider Secret of the Silver Blades too) were to heavy on grinding and hard as hell. To a point where it seems to be unfair.

      I truly think that what the CRPG addict needs is a good Gold Box game to go on with :), just in case he wants to continue his everlong journey.

      Delete
    2. @innategamer
      At least we need one or two months more to make it public and one year to finish it. The project started like an small free (and crappy) game for crpg lovers, but with time... it has become to a very ambitious and comercial game. So we have to polish some things before announce it. If this blog continue opened for some time, I promise I will put links here.

      Delete
    3. Of all the Zelda games to suggest, Wind Waker is probably the very last I'd go with. Judging by what I've read so far I'd say Majora's Mask or Ocarina of Time are most likely to appeal to CRPG Addict's taste. I'm not sure he'd enjoy any of them though, as they're all mostly action games, even Zelda II.

      Delete
    4. An excellent and inventive suggestion, sir, with just two very tiny drawbacks: A) Zelda is not an crpg; B)Zelda is not a PC game.

      Delete
    5. With a little bit of imagination, that's all it takes. Wind Waker has an interesting story, Ocarina has an interesting story too. Even if Link doesn't level up himself much there's still an interesting story. Ocarina takes longer time to finish and it has worse graphics, that's why I suggested Wind Waker. If you're not afraid of a challenge then I'd suggest Majora's Mask, because of all the relations that you can develop with other characters, or NPC's. It isn't all THAT impressive, but MM is the Zelda in my opinion that has the most impressive NPCs and side quests involving NPCs.

      Delete
    6. Wind Waker takes much longer than any other Zelda game I've played. Maybe that's just me though.

      Delete
    7. Wind Waker does take quite some time, but it never feels boring and there's no grinding or anything like that. I guess the shortest Zelda is either Legend of Zelda, I've seen a speed run in about 30 minutes, or ALttP there's a glitch that enables you to beat the game in about 5 minutes. On a second thought maybe either OoT or MM could be fun games, but of course there are no Zelda's that are rpgs.

      Delete
    8. Not true RPGs, no, but Zelda II gets closest I think. I'll play through it next, refresh my memory, and see how close to an RPG it really is.

      Still, seeing as how CRPG Addict didn't seem to enjoy Zeliard for very long, I'd say he wouldn't enjoy many of the Zelda's. Hard to say really.

      Delete
  98. Forget about Zelda. The Addict is done.

    Then why oh why do I keep checking this blog every morning? The only thing left is the comments here.

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  99. I check it every morning too... :(

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  100. I'm on the RSS feed and have email subscribed to the comments on every post (To the point of going through and making sure...)

    I'm filling my addiction to retrogaming with http://advgamer.blogspot.com (Which the addict commented on a fair bit; If you don't look at the dates you can pretend!) and http://crpgrevisited.blogspot.com (Just starting that one out)

    ReplyDelete
  101. I wonder if someone could write a DOSbox extension that would shut off DOSbox after X amount of time, then refuse to let you reboot it for X hours? I think I had something like that on my computer as a kid...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. WOW! Someone needs to write something that can do the same to facebook and youtube. I think I need it, yes a web browser that shuts down facebook and youtube after a while and refuses you access to those sites for a while, that would be cool!

      Delete
  102. Why, Canageek? To keep CRPG Addict from OD'ing? ;)

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  103. I was thinking he could assign time totals for chores and stuff: Do the dishes? 5 min. 1 hour of work on job? 10 min. That type of stuff. Then Dosbox locks for an hour to force him off.

    I've read blog posts of people doing that with Firefox, so that it blocks them off fun sites during the work day, particularly people who work at home.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Awesome! I need that extension or whatever! But then again I wonder if I'd regret it, suffer from withdrawal.

      Delete
  104. *sniff* Thanks for the quality entertainment you've given us thus far! I hope your workload will ease up a little bit (and not just because I want to to return!)

    BTW, I still wish you'd write that RPG book. :-)

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  105. For those without addictive personalities, let me postulate on the purposes of this blog based on my own personality. There is the overt purpose: Blogging about playing through CRPGs and sharing that experience in an informative and entertaining manner. Then there is a much more personal purpose: Self-observation, self-analysis, and documentation of the addiction in process. CRPGA has been using a semi-scientific method of learning about himself through the experience and documentation of his own active addiction. His willingness to share it publicly is both incredibly brave and narcissistic. We have formed a type of 12-step support group comprised of 1) active and recovering gaming addicts, 2) those who probably play too much but keep it under control, and 3) gaming enthusiasts who will never understand what addiction means (and God bless them for that). We are the Greek chorus, the peanut gallery, the adoring fans and the jury of peers -- all in one. But no one will ever judge an addict as harshly as himself...and that, friends, is the nature of obsession and compulsion.
    There is no perfection, and we hide in fantasy from our own inability to achieve the impossible. If those words ring true to your soul, then it is time to re-emerge into the world - imperfect and self-tolerant.
    -- Dave

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  106. Eloquenty put, Dave.

    I guess the questions is: What can change the nature of an addict?

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  107. Sorry to see you go.
    Best of luck!

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  108. 115 comments? Man, this guy had some dedicated followers.

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  109. Well, we're addict addicts... I have to confess too that I'm checking this blog about twice a day, machinally.

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  110. Understandable, going to miss your Blog a lot.

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  111. Yeah I keep checking this daily too. Oh well. :)

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  112. Hate to see you go, but I understand. Wiz 5 will destroy anyone, it's not very fun. You did inspire me to make the new year's resolution to finish my backlog, though. I am trying to blog the whole thing to give motivation. http://backlogkiller.blogspot.com

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  113. Wow, I'm shocked as I only now found out that you're done mr. CRPGAddict :/

    So, thank you so much for all your time playing these oldies and blogging for us, as already said, you made a service for RPG historians... I hope everything in your life soon gets back on track and you have a happy time and enjoy life mate!!!

    So, until you feel ready to journey again with us into those lost forgotten gems, farewell and thank you for everything, all the best!!!

    Regards

    ReplyDelete
  114. I had the addict bookmarked at the top of my bar in chrome for years.

    Now it's hogging up room because I check every day and only a random comment.

    Why did this have to happen??????

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  115. Same for me... checking everyday :(

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  116. Well, let's be honest: the CRPG Addict gave himself a Herculean task. The scope was incredible (every RPG ever released for PC) and the details onerous (trudging through every game, even the awful ones--and from what I can tell, it's mostly awful ones).

    Frankly, I'm amazed he got as far as he did with it. That said, I'll be sad to see it languish. This blog has been extremely entertaining and informative, with quality writing and analysis (and I'm certainly not the only one who thinks so). I have an inkling that if the CRPG Addict really wanted to, he could find a way to make a living off of blogging about these old games.

    Mr. Addict, my hat's off to you for what you've done here. If you decide to pick it back up again, I know that I'll be back to read it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm fairly sure the bad games break at some point (or at least become the minority). I'd guess it happens during the 90s, if only he could get that far. With the amount of indie RPGs though, I'd say he'd hit a slump again (just by shear numbers) in a few decades.

      I agree, and hope he is doing something with his writing talent. I, along with everyone else I'm sure, hope he'll find a way to do both this blog and his life's work.

      Delete
  117. So long, and thanks for all the fish!

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  118. I had a dream The Addict pulled a Lazarus on us. Please tell me it's true.

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  119. Just found this blog. It's great, but it's finished :-(

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  120. The real blame lies with Skyrim. The addict just wanted to play more of it and less of the old stuff.

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    Replies
    1. You should read this blog entry again. He states what the real reason is. Besides, he was pretty much done with Skyrim anyway,

      Delete
  121. I'm sad the blog is on an indefinite hiatus, but in the meantime there's always the crpgaddict youtube channel which I discovered a while ago:
    http://www.youtube.com/user/CRPGAddict
    Maybe making let's play videos on youtube is a better idea than a blog. This is an awesome blog, but the problem is that it takes several hours, maybe half a day, to play a game enough to have material for one blog post (I'm guesstimating of course). When doing a let's play on the other hand there's more or less a 1:1 correspondence between time spent on making the LP and watching it. I still havn't watched the video's, but I mean to. Too bad the crpgaddict hadn't figured out how to record video from his tv, I'd love to see a Skyrim LP.

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  122. You're going to be disappointed, innategamer. I only used the YouTube channel to upload videos I wanted to include in my blog entries. They're only segments of the games, usually the ends, and without narration.

    I understand that some people like LPs, but they have never interested me, either as a creator or as a watcher.

    In other news, this indefinite hiatus thing really isn't working out for me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad to hear from you, and I hope your doing well. Anyway "Everything in moderation, including moderation" as they say. Just relax and have some fun is my only advice.

      Delete
    2. Seriously??? Don't be teasing us, now. ;P Maybe there's some way we could help you. We could remind you not to get too carried away with the addiction, something like that. (I feel like I'm on the verge of a good idea, but it's dangling just out of reach! Arghhhh!)

      Delete
    3. Dang it! I hate it when the good ideas dangle just out of reach! Maybe the elusive dangling idea might be to cull games based on how much production value seems to have went in to them. There's got to be thousands of indie rpgs made, you'll never be able to play all of them. But hopefully that wont be necessary in order to see how the state of the art evolves, because presumably the state of the art can't be found in low production value games.

      Delete
  123. FRACK. I've deleted this post and had to rewrite it TWICE now. Stupid multiple Google Accounts. Screw it, I'm posting from wordpress.

    From memory:

    HE LIVES, HE LIVES!

    Glad to here you are alive and appear to be mostly sane, if still having cravings. Or I could be reading too much into what you said, and you are actually huddled behind the dumpster of a GameStop, stealing power and wifi, a joint made out of torn up Pool of Radiance manual pages and filled with the ground floppy disks clenched in your teeth. I'm hoping it is the first one though.

    Anyway, I was wondering if you could scratch your CRPG itch by reading other people's blogs and watching them play? Or would that just make it worse? What if it was a close genre, say, Adventure Games, instead of CRPGs?

    Alternatively you could try playing, but on a very limited scale: Use say, http://www.chorewars.com/, to track chores you do, and 'earn' CRPG time. Use an eggtimer or something to stop playing when your time is up. Another option would be to keep a log of each hour you play that has to be posted in a public place.

    Finally, if you want to try keeping away from CRPGs (Which may well be your best option, as much as it pains me to admit it) you may want to turn off email notifications about this blog, so we stop tempting you with the adoration of fans.

    --Canageek

    P.S. yes, I am incapable of writing a short comment.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. chorewars!!! Are you telling me that there's an rpg that I can play by doing real life stuff, like work! Wow, I'm checking that out right now! Are there like level ups and stuff? Who get's to decide how much work I've done?, sounds awesome! I might actually become more productive if I played games like that!

      Delete
  124. "In other news, this indefinite hiatus thing really isn't working out for me."

    Hmmmmm...I sense a comeback. While I selfishly hope I'm right, I'm sure I speak for all of your loyal fans when I say "make sure you're ready".

    No-one wants to see a glorious comeback tarnished by the same old demons. If the above comments have shown anything, it's that we'll all still be here, no matter how long it takes.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't know about no matter how long it takes: I do plan on dying in you know, 50 or 60 years, which would presumably make it a bit of a pain to read the blog. Also at some point I assume that RSS feeds will become obsolete, as will the internet itself. On the other hand I love old tech, so I'm giving him oh, 25 years...ok, perhaps 30, before I stop checking his blog. :D

      Delete
    2. Maybe the problem is that too much of anything is bad? Just a theory, but if you got an addiction to something enjoyable or necessary, like food or gaming, then maybe the solution can't be to go cold turkey. Maybe the solution lies in moderation. I suffer from a gaming addiction myself, except I'm addicted to more different kind of games, I don't have a particular kind of game that I have to play all the time. Civilization is a big one for me, I've probably played Civilization 1 alone for more than a year adding up the hours, more than half a day some days for several years. It's sad really, but not playing at all would be like not eating at all. I'm disappointed with the AI in the game though, and I remain determined to make a better AI for it.

      Delete
    3. @Canageek: Maybe Chet realises that the older a game is, the more awesome and/or nostalgic it is to watch someone play through it. I think he knows that CRPG's are like good wine, and he's just aging the rest of the games on his list a bit more before opening.

      It's in all of our best interests! Man, this guy's a genius!

      Delete
    4. @The Trickster: heh, Smart man he is. Every time he delays the blog we get hungrier for more posts.

      @innategamer; Yes, I agree that moderation is indeed the key. I loved the fact that Civ IV had a timer in it, so you could say 'IN 4 hours pop up a message on screen saying "bed time"'

      Delete
  125. I hope that comment means you're coming back, but at the very least I hope it DOESN'T mean that you've decided to get rid of the blog entirely. It'd be a shame to see all this great content disappear.

    ReplyDelete
  126. innategamer: You or someone else on your team puts up chores with XP totals and how much treasure they are worth. Then whomever does the chore can claim that prize.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well I don't have a team, and there didn't seem to be a game involved, just some xp hanging in the air. Otherwise a very interesting idea, but the fact that the site wont remember my history longer than a few days is the bad part. Maybe if I found a save file editor for Pool of Radiance, and I could use it to give myself gold in the game after I've completed a task in real life. That way I might actually be able to beat the game, although it would feel like cheating since it wasn't the original intention of the game. Very interesting concept though, combining gaming and real life work, if I can get xp from it I'll do any monotonous chores. Imagine a factory/sweatshop in the future, workers are not paid in money, instead they're paid in DLC and they have to starve!

      Delete
  127. I SMELL A COMEBACK, BABY!

    ReplyDelete

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