Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Game 30: Alien Fires: 2199 A.D. (1987)

Can it be a coincidence that we have two sci-fi CRPGs, released in the same year, that have an anno domini in the title? And both used wrongly, with the "A.D." coming after, not before, the year? Maybe not, but in any event Alien Fires: 2199 A.D. owes nothing to 2400 A.D. It has a very different interface and plot. Also, it doesn't make any sense.

If a "time-transportation device" threatens the universe, one wonders what the "TimeLords" actually do to earn their titles.

The game's backstory is an obvious fusion of Doctor Who and Apocalypse Now. You play a TimeLord (one of an immortal race of beings responsible for protecting the temporal balance of the universe) given a quest by your TimeLord Elders to track down the brilliant and disturbed Samuel Kurtz, who has escaped to "a small planet at the edge of known universe" with an "awesome device" that "threatens to twist the very fabric of time itself."

My character is as slow as a snail crawling on the edge of a straight razor.

Character creation involves giving yourself a name and allocating 99 points among seven skills: fighting, marksmanship, diplomacy, dexterity, understanding, tracking, and quickness. The manual describes each of these skills, and they are about what you'd expect, but I love their description for "understanding," which includes: "generally, this will help your character point dangerous items like plasma rifles in the correct direction before firing them." Wow. I hope it helps with not walking into walls, too.

The game starts you off in the middle of a space station called Galaxy's End, with very little information about what to do except that you need to find an elevator to the next level. (I think the manual I've found is only a partial one, which doesn't help.) The game is in first-person view with wireframe walls (how retro) but--get this--continuously scrolling. We haven't seen this since Alternate Reality.

The other graphics in the game seem pretty decent, such as the various robots you encounter in the station.

Or maybe this guy isn't a robot. It's hard to tell.

Now, on the robots: you can talk to them, and the dialog, as far as I can tell, is completely open-ended. I don't mean just keywords here; you type entire sentences! Naturally, it must be scanning your sentences for keywords, but it still feels pretty cool. Here's a conversation I just had with what looks like a droid but might be a man. The horrible errors of grammar and syntax are the game's, not mine.

  • TRISTAR: Hello. I hope you have come to help us, there is not much time - you must go to the next level and talk to angel, but beware - there are Octo agents everywhere.
  • ME: Who are you?
  • TRISTAR: I am Tristar, the chief and only mechanic of Galaxy's End.
  • ME: What are you?
  • TRISTAR: What do you mean, what am I? What are you? What is anybody? I am a sophisticated chemical composition comprised of about 76 percent water. So there.
  • ME: What are Octo agents?
  • TRISTAR: Octo is a scientific research company, they are very secretive. They often land here for supplies and shipments of Micalite from the mine.
  • ME: Where is the elevator?
  • TRISTAR: The elevator is in the elevator shaft
  • ME: That was really helpful, thanks.
  • TRISTAR: I don't understand what you mean.
  • ME: Where is the elevator shaft?
  • Tristar the mechanic leaves

It's like a combination of Starflight, when NPCs abruptly broke off conversation for no reason, presumably so you wouldn't learn everything in one sitting, and the open-ended dialog of the Origin titles.

The dialog isn't completely open-ended, unfortunately.

Alien Fires chooses to sacrifice what could be a pretty awesome dialog system with stuff like this, though:

I could have happily gone my entire CRPG career without a W.K.R.P. reference. Alas, it was not to be.

I encountered these three entities within just a couple of minutes of wandering the initial corridors (by the way, if you swear at them, they attack you and you die; I know you were all wondering). So far, I've gotten that I need to talk to Whitey in the bar on Level 2.

Now let's talk about the game's problems. Aside from the story issues (and the seeming randomness of your starting point), the interface is horrible. Commands are through the function keys, which probably made sense on some keyboard but which is fairly impossible on my laptop without looking first. (Yes, I know DOSBox has a keyboard mapper. I don't know why, but I can't get it to work. Everything I do just ends up disabling the keys.) Second, even in DOSBox cranked up to some CPU speed 100 times what was available in 1987, the corridors take a few seconds to redraw each time you move. Since people and droids draw last, you usually find yourself blazing past them, and you have to keep stopping and turning around. The continual scrolling alternates between being unresponsive and way too responsive. I hit the right or left arrows and nothing happens, so I hold them down for a couple seconds and I end up spinning in place for five or six revolutions.

It may be that none of these things are the creators' faults, and just an issue with playing the game on modern platforms, but it still reduces my enthusiasm for slogging through however many hours of this.

I do have my first quest, though. I encountered this rabbit/horse thing smoking a pipe and told him I wanted a weapon.

There you have it. The fate of the universe hangs in the balance, and I'm off to find a pocket watch for the pipe-smoking rabbit-horse so I can defend all creation with a hunting knife. I'm sure you'll wait with bated breath for my next posting.


  1. Maybe it's because the game itself is so absurd, but I think this is one of the funniest posts of yours I've read this far... Perhaps you should change the subtitle of your blog to the "fate of the universe" sentence from the last paragraph, it seems fitting. *g*

    "Can it be a coincidence that we have two sci-fi CRPGs, released in the same year, that have an anno domini in the title?"

    That is odd, but I think it'd be a whole lot stranger if you started coming across SF games with B.C. in the title!

    "And both used wrongly, with the "A.D." coming after, not before, the year?"

    That does seem to have been the standard in pop culture, though, and most game creators know a lot more in that department than historical info. (Then again, when I was in K-12 school, it was written after the number; my undergrad classes didn't need it.)

  2. I liked the conversation....

    # ME: Where is the elevator?
    # TRISTAR: The elevator is in the elevator shaft
    # ME: That was really helpful, thanks.
    # TRISTAR: I don't understand what you mean.
    # ME: Where is the elevator shaft?
    # Tristar the mechanic leaves

  3. +1 for funniest post yet.

    I've never even heard of this game and I thought I played every RPG made in the 80's :) Doesn't look like I missed much.

  4. Alas, Johnny Fever was worried about his job being taken over by machines (in the epsiode "Holdup". It has come to pass.

  5. BWAH! I don't think I ever heard of this one (was it mentioned in Matt Barton's book?), and was certainly unaware of it in the 1980s. Still, in a bizarre way, I'm kinda retroactively plugging for it just 'cuz of the pipe-smoking bunnytaur.

  6. Ah, Jessica didn't swoon when you spoke french to her? Alas. I suppose she didn't respond well to the same question in English either?

  7. "The game's backstory is an obvious fusion of Doctor Who and Apocalypse Now."
    Yes, you are probably right about AN being the inspiration but it's also possible that the designers went to the original work that AN brilliantly adapted: Joseph Conrads "Heart of Darkness"
    (which has nothing to do with Vietnam, BTW).

    As for the game I can only be superficial as I just read reviews of the Amiga version back then. They weren't exactly overwhelming and I'm interested to see if the mediocre graphics (the PC version is downright ugly, IMHO) are redeemed by good, inventive gameplay.
    It does not bode well when the designers plundered the classics here and there to get the thing off the ground in the first place...

  8. I'm glad you all thought it was funny. I need to write more postings after taking OxyCodone (legitimately; threw out my back).

    Good call, Calibrator. I had heard about "Heart of Darkness," but I had the idea that the villain wasn't named Kurtz. I was wrong.

    Adamantyr, Jessica attacked me when I asked the same question in English. Brutal game.

  9. Wow, that Dr. Fever robot reminds me of Moraff's World.

  10. I played this game for hours and days on my cousins Commodore Amiga 1000 he got from the make a wish foundation. Its was fun for what we had back in the day and totally made sense out of nothing lol.

    1. I'm going to give it another try on a different platform when I come through 1987 again. It's ice to hear fond recollections about it.


I welcome all comments about the material in this blog, and I generally do not censor them. However, please follow these rules:

1. Do not link to any commercial entities, including Kickstarter campaigns, unless they're directly relevant to the material in the associated blog posting. (For instance, that GOG is selling the particular game I'm playing is relevant; that Steam is having a sale this week on other games is not.) THIS ALSO INCLUDES USER NAMES THAT LINK TO ADVERTISING.

2. Please avoid profanity and vulgar language. I don't want my blog flagged by too many filters.

3. Please don't comment anonymously. It makes it impossible to tell who's who in a thread. Choose the "Name/URL" option, pick a name for yourself, and just leave the URL blank.

Also, Blogger has a way of "eating" comments, so I highly recommend that you copy your words to the clipboard before submitting, just in case.

NOTE: Spam has gotten so bad lately that I've had to turn on comment moderation for posts older than 10 days. I apologize if it takes a little while for your comment to appear.